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Proof #5

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Well it’s been a while since I did my last post in my Proof series.

You can see the previous posts here, here and here.

A little back info… Proof is a series where I like to talk about people in my life that show proof of His love in my life.

This one is a big one.

One that has impacted me more than I know.

The most influential person in my life, my biggest cheerleader, my best friend, my shoulder to cry on, my personal chef, my voice of reason, the most optimistic person I know….

my mom.

(***mother starts crying here***)

My mom is the most graceful and strongest person I know.
No matter what obstacles she faces, she does it with such poise.
She is a constant voice of reason and relaxation in my life.
She doesn’t get fed up with my constant complaining but instead gives the most optimistic advice.
She makes me laugh harder than anyone I know… we are too much alike it’s insane.

I can only imagine to be half the person she is someday.

Mommy, I love you and thank you for constantly being
Proof of His love.

XOXO
E.

Rest.

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Rest.

A word I don’t really take into consideration.

If you’re anything like me, life is go go go.

I don’t stop.

I’m a perfectionist and I feel like I can’t say no to any good opportunity.

So I overwork myself, don’t sleep, don’t eat properly and am always exhausted.

It’s no ones fault but my own.

I take on more than I can handle and I know that.

(going to start reading the best yes soon lol)

Last semester was specifically tough on me.

I would leave my apartment around 7:30 every morning and not get back until 11pm or later every night.

Not really healthy.

I was having a starbz date one day with someone who quickly become a good friend and someone I’ve come to really look up to. She was talking about how she was feeling the same way and that she needed to take some time for herself.

Wuuuuut.

She was talking about how Jesus only stepped into full time ministry, traveling and spreading news about Him for just a few years, before then he was a carpenter.

I never thought of that before.

Often during His travels, Jesus would sneak away for alone time with God and to fully rest in His presence.

Y’all, Jesus rested!

I feel like we live in such a fast paced and go go go society and we’re wired to continuously keep going, when that’s not what our bodies want or what God wants for us.

As soon as she was saying the words about what was going on in her life, I knew that was God telling me to stop and rest.

This convo did happen the week before finals so I couldn’t really not then lol.. so I made the decision that over Christmas break I was going to rest.

I didn’t work and I’ve worked through the semesters and every break since I was 16.

I wasn’t going to make lots of plans and try to see a lot of people while I was home.

I wasn’t going to serve at church for those two weeks.

I was going to rest.

And I did.

Boy oh boy am I grateful I did.

I spent my Christmas break reading, hanging out with my parents and sleeping. lots of sleeping.

I’ve never really spent that long doing nothing before.

Rest can look very different for lots of people, but I knew I needed a mental, emotional and physical detox.

I feel like I’m still not fully recovered from the crazy of last semester.

But I’m more motivated now to do things than I was three weeks ago.

I’ve learned that it’s okay to say no. I don’t always need to hang out with friends, I don’t have to say yes to every opportunity presented to me and I can’t take on more than I could handle.

Stepping into my last semester of college, I’m going to make time for me and God, to rest in His presence and make sure I start getting at least 6-7 hours of sleep a night!

It’s okay to not be okay.

It’s okay to recognize that and make steps to being okay.

XOXO,

What a Dream

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Since graduation is right around the corner for me, I have been thinking about what I want my life to look like for the rest of my life. It’s funny how much my goals and dreams have changed in such a short time.

If you would have asked me in high school what I thought my life would look like right now I would say “I’ll be engaged by 22, married by 23, kids by 24; living in my hometown the rest of my life.”

That situation is the farthest thing from my current reality.

+ for that I am thankful.

I’m 21 years old w/o a boy in sight.

I’m not going to be engaged by 22 (that’s 3 months away HOLY CRAP).

So that means no marriage by 23….and certainly no kids by 24.

+ I am very thankful for that.

+ can we just bless up that I don’t want to spend the rest of my life in my hometown.

+ This I am extra thankful for.

Current reality:

I am 21 with my whole life ahead of me.

I have absolutely no clue what I want to do when I graduate.

Seriously I am open to any and everything.

Yesterday I applied to 6 jobs and they are all completely different.

Some in Greenville, SC, some in NY, NY, some in ATL.

I’m seriously trying to keep my options open bc idk what God has next for me yet,

but I am going to let him decide and plan that for me.

As much as I want to already have it figured out right now, I have nothing figured out.

But here is what I do know.

My goal, my dream, my passion in life is connecting with other people, building relationships, being a light in the dark, pointing people to Jesus.

+ nothing else matters.

God’s given my a passion for fashion, a passion for blogging, a passion for people.

He’s given me these things for a reason so hopefully my career someday will revolve around these things.

Idk how God is going to orchestrate this in my life. I know He is faithful and He has given me these passions for a reason + He is going to make sure that I see them out.

I feel like I’m Julian rn asking

“What comes next??”

(if ya know, ya know)

God comes next.

XOXO,